At 17, She Fell in Love With a 47-Year-Old. Now She Questions the Story.

In 1970, when Jill Ciment was a rebellious teenager, she did something shocking.

Dreaming of becoming an artist, Ciment signed up for classes with Arnold Mesches, a well-known painter whose work she admired. Respect grew into infatuation, and one night after class, she waited for the other students to leave, and approached him.

“I unbuttoned the top three buttons of my peasant blouse, crossed the ink-splattered floor, and kissed him,” Ciment, now an acclaimed novelist, wrote in her 1996 memoir, “Half a Life.”

She was 17 at the time. He was 47, married with two teenage children.

When Ciment wrote “Half a Life,” she and Mesches had been together for more than 20 years. He was the first reader on everything she wrote. After reading the scene, he had quibbled with a few phrases, but agreed on the key fact: She instigated the kiss.

A few years ago, Ciment found herself reconsidering their origin story. Mesches had died of leukemia in 2016, at age 93. The #MeToo movement had unleashed a debate about sexual harassment and assault committed by men in positions of power. Ciment started to question her earlier account of their courtship.

She picked up “Half a Life” and found the passage describing their first kiss. She was stunned by how she had distorted the encounter, she said. She recalled that night perfectly, because she had fantasized about it for months afterward. After the other students left the art studio, she lingered. She wanted to ask Mesches for advice on how to pursue a career as an artist. He pulled her toward him and kissed her.